19 yo: The Mission Statement
I keep asking myself, how did I get here already…how am I about to enter year 40 of my life? I know I am not the only woman who approaches mid-life and asks themselves this question. I have taken the last several months replaying excerpts of my childhood, teenage years, my big 30th birthday bash, wedding, and now motherhood over and over. In this last year of my thirties I have been so determined on how else I can stay true to my calling or purpose for inhabiting this earth.
In 1998 (I was 19) I attended a college Bible study and was asked to write my “mission statement”- I think this was a thing in the late 90’s not sure but you get the drift. Seeing is believing and by writing my life’s mission or main cause as to what I wanted my life to account for was important to me, so I took the exercise very seriously. I wrote: “To motivate and inspire self-worth in the hearts and minds of the women around me”. I still have this tattered and torn 20-year-old notecard with me to this day, it traveled with me to college in the Midwest, and back to CA years later. I have opened up this card many times in my life where I didn’t know who I was, where my life was going, or to be quite honest had no self-worth and no understanding as to how I would ever live up to the words on that paper and it confused me. Why would I write something so unachievable when I didn’t even love myself most days? How could I ever have a platform to inspire other women? And, who would even care to listen to anything I would have to say?
I don’t want to get “churchy” here or preach, God knows that there are dozens of folks out there that wouldn’t even consider me a Christian based on the fact of where I stand politically or that I love me a glass of fine wine or a strong Cuba Libre. However, this is what I know and what is true to me… Call it Jesus and the universe in my personal situation, but it could be any higher power to whom you speak to (I am a huge supporter of co-existing) if there is something, a burning desire, a dream, your biggest hope, or a vision you have that haunts you daily chances are that God, the universe, your source of strength imagined…placed that desire inside you. I believe that at some point around turning 19 years old this dream or “mission statement” was planted in my being to make a difference and positively affect others, though I am just now seeing the words on that notecard make some sense.
Lord knows it has taken me 20 years to see these dreams envisioned finally fall into place but my story, my journey, and the many years of mistakes give me the right words to now finally share with you. It’s funny how life comes full circle. Ideas you may have had or situations you may have encountered truly happen for a reason as cliché as it may sound. My past and present will become my content for this blog. My hope is to remain real and raw even when it may be hard to share because I know someone reading this needs to hear it and be inspired and know that there is always hope. I plan to cover topics that pertain to personal experiences that others may not feel comfortable sharing such as purity culture and the #metoo movement, body positivity, loving those who have hurt you from a distance, mental illness, loss of a loved one, and dealing with family and substance abuse. I will also share the lighthearted stuff like my life as a “girl mom”, travel hacks for toddler parents, beauty discoveries, positive mindset and self-talk.
If you have gotten this far, I thank you! Your support means the world as I take on this new challenge of blogging.